Two Years

Wednesday, 03 January 2007

Today marks the two year anniversary of when things finally "clicked" for me, and I began my attempts at behavior modification. I look at it as a shift in behavior; a series of different choices, rather than a diet. I really feel like my approach to food is completely different, and I'm not in a place where I would even allow myself to consume some of the crap with which I used to routinely numb myself. I still have the capacity to overeat, of course, but I manage it much better. Two years feels like a really good start, but I think three or four years will feel like I've gotten over the hump. Actually, getting through this pregnancy at a healthy weight, continuing the same habits, will be a major accomplishment, as well. So, while I'm very proud of myself, I'm still aware that I'm not completely out of the woods yet. Statistically, the odds are against those who lose weight that they will keep it off. So, I'm all for defying statistics. We'll see.

This pregnancy is starting off a bit different. I've had a lot more nausea and food aversions than I ever had before. In fact, I don't even think I ever felt queasy at all with my last two, so this is a new experience. After a little trial and error, I've discovered that eating little bits throughout the day is much more effective for me, and eliminates the bloated feeling I get. It also tends to help with the nausea, as eating tends to help.

I haven't yet decided whether I want to try for another homebirth, risk delivering in the car by driving an hour to the free-standing birth center in Bethesda, or see and OB and go the hospital route. I'm actually fairly sure I don't want to go the hospital route, as I'm just not into the whole managed care aspect of birth that happens in a hospital. I like being in whatever position I so choose, I like having whomever I want in the room there, and I don't want my baby whisked off and given vaccinations at birth. All these things aren't really negotiable in a hospital, or require a lot of stress going against policies. Thus, the free-standing birth center would be ideal, as they approach labor more naturally, though they are still medical professionals. However, the hour drive part is a big obstacle, considering both births so far have been fairly quick. Lastly, there are a couple homebirth midwives out this way that I've yet to investigate, but it's certainly not openly supported by the community, so it always feels like swimming upstream, which can get tiring. So, lots to think about... I've got a few weeks to make a decision.

In the meantime, I'm just focusing on TRYING to relax as much as possible, and eating nutritiously. Oranges and pears have been my biggest craving so far. I was into eating an apple every morning, but all of a sudden, apples are less appealing. This week we've had kale, beats, white beans and tomatoes, lots of salad, lentil soup, chili, oatmeal, just to randomly sample our menu. I think I'm doing fairly well. I'm kind of not focusing on the weight too much, even though I've gained a couple pounds. I know I haven't overeaten and I've been even more conscious to have less sugar, no caffeine and get in the most nutrients possible. So, that's all I can do.

Happy New Year!