Food Fog

Potluck, Green Juice and Pie... Oh My!

Monday, 30 November 2009

This past weekend we held our first raw food MeetUp.com potluck. It was an intimate gathering with just two friends. But, it was a relaxing afternoon with some great food, of which we're still enjoying the leftovers! These groups often take time to get going, so we'll try again in the New Year. It's a lot of fun to share recipe ideas and a good meal.

Yesterday was International Juice Feasting Day, which was creative by Dave, the Raw Food Truck Driver (http://www.rawexistence.com/Dave-raw-food-truck-driver.html). In honor of his inspiration, Darren and I made a couple nice big glasses of green juice this morning and toasted to good health! We would both love to do a juice fast sometime, but were not feeling organized or informed enough yet to embark on that. I think I could easily do a day or two, but beyond that, I'd need to schedule it in.

My niece asked me for the link to JoAnn Farb's website today, and in doing so, I came across an article on her blog at http://getoffgluten.blogspot.com about recurrent abdominal pain possibly being a pre-cursor to Celiac Disease. We saw her at Vegetarian Summerfest last summer and I remember hearing her story about her daughter's experience with gluten, and thinking how at least Joe wasn't allergic to wheat on top of all his other allergies. However, thinking back, Joe had always been saying his tummy hurt, and the week we were at Summerfest where he was eating tons of vegan pizza, he spent much of the time, especially right after meals, trying to lay down somewhere because his stomach hurt. Little did I known then, that a few months later, allergy testing would reveal he was allergic to wheat and soy. Talk about a challenge when you're already on a nut, legume and mostly seed-free vegan diet, right? Well, it was at first, but we've gotten in a groove and have plenty great food options, so we don't focus too much on the things he can't have.

I made a raw pumpkin pie last night, and we ate some today. I made it with pumpkin seeds and raisins for the crust, rather than almonds, so Joe could have it. It was quite good, but I think it would be perfect with an almond crust. But, pumpkin pie has always been one of my favorites, so I was pleasantly surprised to find a raw version that was so enjoyable. I'll be tweaking it and trying it again over the holidays.

Tomorrow is our produce delivery day, and I have a bunch of citrus and Lulu avocados coming, so I'll be looking for interesting recipe ideas for those. I've actually found that mashing ripe avocados with a little lemon juice, then freezing them, makes a nice addition to a smoothie frozen, or thawed out in a salad. I also have a ton of kale and collards coming, so I'm looking forward to doing a lot of green juicing this week!

Thanksgiving 2009

Thursday, 26 November 2009

We purposefully made no plans for today, to give ourselves a chance to just hang out at home and relax. We didn't make any special dinner, but we did make a point to sit down together for a bit at the table and share what we were thankful for. The kids had spaghetti for dinner, and Darren and I spent the day giving our GreenStar juicer a real work-out.

We started the morning (actually, it was more like 1pm) with juicing. First, it was a bunch of carrots, since we are going to use the pulp to make a raw carrot cake for a potluck on Saturday. Then it was onto apples and oranges, then the greens; dandelion greens, kale and collard greens. We made ourselves nice big glasses of green juice, and had a Thanksgiving toast.

After a brief interlude, we changed the attachment on the juicer, to use it as a food processor, and ran through the ingredients for a raw bread we put in the dehydrator. After that excitement was done, we took another pause to watch the Food, Inc. DVD that arrived from NetFlix this week. It was good; nothing I didn't already know, but I think it's eye-opening for someone who has never thought about where their food comes from.

Next it was onto peeling butternut squash and pumpkin that I've had in the fridge from our produce co-op for a couple weeks. I figured if it's all chopped up in chunks in the fridge, I might actually use it. So, mission completed. I think tomorrow I'll make butternut squash soup, and maybe try out a recipe for raw pumpkin pie I have. I'm curious what that would taste like.

Around 8 o'clock, we all felt a little stir-crazy, and the kids were driving us crazy. It was pouring outside, and we hadn't been out of the house all day. So, we piled in the car to take a short drive around town to see if anything was open... only WalMart... kept driving... chatted for a bit... headed home...

Darren went to bed early, hoping to get an early start on his work in the morning. I folded laundry, emptied the dishwasher, paid bills and refereed the kids until midnight, when they FINALLY succumbed to sleep. Jeesh! Where do they get that energy?

So, all in all, a nice Thanksgiving. No big family gatherings, or abundant feast, but it was actually a treat to have no agenda and no schedule for a day. Cliché as it is, I'm just thankful for being together, our health and home. Now begins the holiday madness!

RawFu Challenge - Day 100!

Wednesday, 18 November 2009

A few months ago, while surfing around on the Internet checking out various raw food sites, I came across RawFu.com. It's a community of raw food enthusiasts and a wealth of information and support for those just testing the raw waters, as well as, those already full immersed and treading with ease. It's here that the idea of a 100 day raw food challenge prompted my sense of adventure and creativity, and I decided to sign up! I had already been eating a fairly healthy vegan, mostly raw diet for awhile, so it wasn't completely out there for me.

RawFu.com

I told Darren about my plan to do the challenge, and he eagerly decided to join in, too! After spending a week at Vegetarian Summerfest 2009 the month prior, Darren was feeling the effects of over-indulging in some great vegan food. Thankfully, they had tons of raw options, too, so I thoroughly enjoyed my own personal challenge of increasing more raw food in my diet. It was great not to have to prepare food for a week!

Nonetheless, at the end of the week, Darren was up four or five pounds, and feeling a bit lethargic and bloated. And,after spending that week in July attending various environmental, health and animal rights lectures, several of which were on the raw food lifestyle, we were both feeling inspired to take on a challenge, and the one at RawFu.com seemed fitting.

We actually started the challenge a couple weeks prior to the start date, just easing into it. Our goal was to be as close to 100 percent raw as possible, without being obsessive or ridiculous about it. I opted to keep my one vice of a cup or two per day of decaf organic coffee with raw hemp or almond milk, but Darren was used to having several cups a day of regular coffee with sweetened soy creamer, so he decided to stop drinking coffee all together. He definitely had worse withdrawal from that. My coffee habit seemed to fall away effortlessly in the past month, though I still love the taste of coffee, and will have one now and then, if I feel so inclined. I guess I just don't feel inclined lately.

As I had been gradually easing into it, I didn't really experience any detox symptoms, other than maybe some minor skin issues. But, Darren did have a week or so episode of what really seemed like detox. He didn't have a fever, but had flu-like symptoms, muscle weakness, fatigue and just overall felt bad. But, once that passed, it has been pretty smooth sailing. We both felt the transition from semi-healthy vegan to raw food wasn't too hard, but feel it would not have been doable eight or ten years ago, when we were overweight junk-food vegetarians.

During the 100 days, Darren shed about 30 pounds. He expected some weight loss, but I think he was surprised how easily it came off without depriving himself at all. I, on the other hand, didn't budge the scale more than a couple pounds during this process. But, I also didn't go into it with weight loss as a goal. I could stand to probably lose another ten to twenty pounds to be in the really fit category, but for me, gradual slow change is where I'm most comfortable. After years of an eating disorder and yo-yo dieting, maintaining my weight and balanced eating habits is my measure of success; not rapid weight loss.

Raw Cauliflower Popcorn

Cravings weren't a huge issue for me. Well, at least for cooked food. I definitely lean towards liking sweet stuff, like fresh and dried fruits and raw chocolate, but I never felt an overwhelming desire for any particular cooked food. Darren, on the other hand, had one thematic craving on and off, which was for these sea salt and pepper baked potato chips that he used to eat once or twice a week. I think we did a good job of coming up with raw alternatives that incorporated those textures and flavors, so he persevered.

This process has been revealing. Over the past five years, with over a hundred pound weight loss behind me, every change in my diet or lifestyle really presents the challenge of finding balance within it. I know I could abuse healthy vegan or raw food, just as I could processed junk food. I definitely feel the quality of food absolutely makes a difference with everything from mood swings to headaches. But, even if you're eating superb quality foods, if you're overeating them or stressing out about them, then you're likely to hinder any real sense of balance in life. So, I've gained a lot of clarity as to the role of food in my life. I'm thankful for these insights, and I will always be a work in progress.

So, overall this has been a great experience. There have been times when we've gotten into a bit of a food rut, or for me, the stress of preparing separate things for the kids and us, as well as, accommodating Joe's allergies, has been overwhelming. But, for the most part, I really enjoy the creative aspect of concocting raw recipes, in addition to seeing the impact it has on me physically. There were only a few social occasions where I felt like kind of a pain in the ass, as I concocted my big salad, or brought along my raw hemp milk for my tea or whatever, but mostly, it was pretty easily sustainable. I do feel I'm at kind of a plateau, and it will require some shift or change to move in a new direction. That might be in the form of exercise. It may be further tweaking my diet. It may mean just changing my perception or behaviors. I don't know yet. I'll be open to whatever it is when it presents itself.

Both Darren and I plan to further explore the raw food lifestyle and enjoy the process of growing and learning together. Neither one of us want to get caught up on numbers or percentages, but just want to do what feels right for us at the moment. I'm a big fan of intuition; looking inside myself for answers, rather than always relying on external sources. As parents, we're both cognizant of the model we portray for our kids. With my previous food history, my ultimate goal is not to have my children religiously follow my dietary path, but to give them the tools to have a balanced relationship with food, and to make the best choices for themselves. Cliché as it sounds, life is a journey... of which, food is just a part.

Off to think up a new challenge....

RawFu Challenge - Day 95

Friday, 13 November 2009

Unfortunately, our attempts to defer purchasing a new computer were thwarted by the sudden demise of our old PC. So, we spent an unpleasant hour or two at Best Buy, trying to pick out the most affordable, yet functional, desktop computer. That accomplished, I spent the next two days trying to salvage stuff from the old computer, transfer it to the new one, and set things back up the way there were. Needless to say, the only time I have to do such things is late at night when the kids are sleeping. Thus, I'm feeling the disagreeable effects of sleep deprivation, and will shortly be heading to bed. At least I have the blissful opportunity of not having to get up TOO early tomorrow, so I have the chance at a decent night sleep.

When I'm chronically tired, I tend to eat more, under the false impression that food will somehow negate the effects of fatigue and give me the energy to forge onward through my day. Thankfully, my only potentially over consumed foods have been an extra cup of tea with almond milk, some frozen bananas or hemp seeds and raisins. Darren and I are quite ensconced in the daily routine of green smoothies and creative salad making, so those tend to be the staple meals. In the past couple days, I made another batch of granola, so we've alternated that once or twice, just to mix things up. We've also made more soups recently in the VitaMix, maybe for a little warmth. In addition, we've been adding kelp noodles to soups and salads, too, which give a little more texture and added minerals. We even tried some fresh yacon (fruit) this week from our produce co-op. So, we're not in a food rut anymore than we were ten years ago, eating the same three Lean Cuisine meals over and over!

One minor revelation I had the other day was that it has been a couple weeks since I had any coffee. I have drank a daily cup or two of decaf organic coffee with non-dairy milk for years. I really love the taste of coffee, and figured it was a minor vice that I wasn't willing to part with quite yet. However, the other day, I was making myself a cup of tulsi tea with fresh almond milk, possibly my newest vice, when it occurred to me that I couldn't remember when I'd last had a cup of coffee. My jar of Mount Hagen instant organic decaf coffee sits idly on the counter waiting for me to revisit, but I've not felt compelled recently. This may be due, in part, to the fact that I'm just drinking tea instead. But, I felt the draw to coffee, even decaf, to be strong, and for it to so casually lose its grip that I hardly noticed was interesting. Of course, I don't think we'll part ways with any finality right now, but the lessened degree of moderate dependency is probably a good thing for our relationship.

Tomorrow, Darren is taking Flo and Joe up to York, PA for a hockey game. Knowing that he would be gone most of the day, I helped him concoct a couple treats to take along. Using the pulp from the apple carrot juice we made today, I made a carrot cake-ish dish by just adding a little of the juice back, a squirt of agave, some raisins and coconut. Mushed that into a small container and topped with a little more coconut. Voila... portable dessert. For his dinner, we made a sauce out of hemp and pumpkin seeds, garlic, a little nutritional yeast, butternut squash, sea salt and spices, and poured that over kelp noodles, adding some chopped kale, red onion and diced carrot. It actually looks rather gourmet. The kids, on the other hand, get the econo-vegan option of black beans and rice. I don't have the energy to be anymore creative right now.

As the 100 day raw food challenge is coming to a close, I feel I've somewhat hit a plateau, both physically and emotionally. I'm aware of the need for change in order to facilitate some further forward movement. I'm open to some further moderate dietary challenges, though I like my changes in lifestyle, especially food, to be gradual and sustainable, so I don't think anything too radical is going to spark my interest right now. I'd love to do a juice fast sometime, and I know I should further tweak my diet if I want to really max out the health benefits of raw foods, but I'm in no rush. Therefore, as I reflect a bit upon the things that this challenge has revealed to me, I'm starting to ponder my next challenge. The possibilities are endless... no frivolous spending for 90 days, writing so many words per day for a story, going to bed by 11 every night, reading a challenging book, an exercise challenge, relationship challenges, creative challenges, social challenges... hmm... much to consider. After all, I like a good challenge!

RawFu Challenge - Day 90

Monday, 09 November 2009

The day started off with an impromptu decision to tag along with Darren and Joe to Joe’s hockey game in Rockville. I had planned to get up and meet my mom to take Flo and Zofia to church. But, surprisingly, I was up and ready earlier than expected, so the option to join Darren and Joe presented itself. Flo decided to stay home and accompany Grandma to church, so I figured a day out with just two kids would be a change of pace.

Though I was up earlier, it still left little time for pondering food prep for a day away. So, I fed Joe a bowl of leftover oatmeal and raw fudgsicle I made yesterday that he instead he must try… nice combo for breakfast. I then quickly blended up a green smoothie of spinach, apple, lemon, a few chunks of frozen banana and a hunk of raw ginger. I shoved it, along with a couple apples and water, in the cooler, and out the door we went!

We arrived at the rink early, and since I had a little time to spare, Zofia and I headed over to My Organic Market to grab a few snacks for the day while Darren got Joe suited up for his game. I went into MOM’s with the intention of just getting a few pieces of fruit and maybe some celery or box of greens. I emerged over a hundred dollars later with a bag full of raw goodies, including sprouted cashews, Turkish figs, raw chocolate truffles, kale chips, raw crackers, some lovely herbal teas, raw sauerkraut, raw salsa, Asian pears… oh, and some celery. We justify these occasional indulgences by the fact that at least we don’t have any other real expensive vices. Ha!

I headed back to the rink just in time to see the first, and second period of Joe’s game. The score was 10 to 0 by the second period, so apparently, that’s called a “shut out” and the game commenced after only a half an hour. Graciously, the losing team extended Joe’s team an invitation to stay and practice for a little longer, since they were all suited up and eager to play, anyway.

After Joe’s hockey victory, we headed over to Best Buy to browse around and add things to our wish list. Zofia slept in her stroller and Joe watched a cartoon on a big screen TV, so Darren and I just stood around talking, looking at various gadgets. We want a new digital camcorder, and we “need” a new computer, but rather than the general “buy now, pay later” mentality of this pre-holiday season, we’re opting to buy and pay at the same time… later. Nonetheless, we enjoyed the peaceful interlude and got some ideas to add to our list.

We then headed home, stopping in Frederick at the Common Market for a potty break. We picked up a small box of spring mix and an avocado, to which we added some of the raw salsa I got from MOM’s earlier. That, along with a shared bottle of kombucha, was dinner. Considering our earlier indulgence in sprouted nuts, imported fruit, and raw chocolate, this light fare was welcomed.

Upon arriving home, I promptly donned my reflective strip, and headed out for a walk with the dog for about 45 minutes. The weather was gorgeous today, and despite being just a tad chilly, my jaunt was a meditative interval and a nice way to wind down the day. Well, until I got back and had to face the day’s worth of neglected housework needing attention before I could go to bed… but, hey, only 1:30am, it’s all done!

RawFu Challenge - Day 87

Thursday, 05 November 2009

I’m keeping it real today. The lyrics from the song “Bad Day” by Daniel Powter are playing in my head. Aside from a couple half hour reprieves on the treadmill and walking the dog, I spent most of the day in the kitchen, preparing food, or cleaning up the aftermath. Just when one meal was done, someone else was hungry. In the early afternoon, Darren got home from his weekly jaunt to DC for work, and I started making rice for this afternoon’s stir-fry for my in-laws and the kids. I suddenly just felt creatively drained and overwhelmed. I then almost unconsciously start nibbling on stuff over the next couple hours while preparing dinner… a bunch of frozen bananas, five or six dates with hemp seed and cocoa powder, handfuls of raisins and sprouted pumpkin seeds, a handful of goji berries, a cup of tea with hemp milk, an apple, and some raw chocolate smoothie I was making for Darren and his parents. All in all, these items don’t sound like a terrible junk-food binge, but it felt bad. I felt detached and unconscious, and that hasn’t happened to me more than a few times in the past five years.

Thus, I found myself, in the late afternoon, having to take a step back and assess the day’s dietary damage without beating myself up, but rather looking at it as an opportunity to examine why I responded that way. What was it I was responding to? My old self would have slipped into negativity, chastising myself for losing control and feeling weak or diminished in some way. My now self feels the physical impact of too many “sweets” and laments the setback. But, by tonight, after a few hours away from the kitchen, I feel resolute in my ability to go on tomorrow as usual, making sound and conscious food decisions for myself. In fact, I won’t even weigh myself tomorrow, because I know I won’t like the number. My old self could not resist measuring her self-worth by the number on the scale, especially after an episode of over indulgence. My now self says the number on the scale is a good indicator of long-term progress, but not an immediate measurement of success.

Still, today brings up all sorts of old addictive feelings and almost post-traumatic flashbacks of long periods of time spent not liking myself as a result of my relationship with food. Having covered the spectrum of disordered eating behavior, I pride myself on the recent years spent in the middle of that spectrum, practicing balance and moderation. It’s a good place to live; a platform for true growth and the experience of one’s authentic nature without the clutter of self-abuse. It’s where I want to stay, and even the occasional emergence of old thought patterns or compulsive behavior won’t take me back there.

So, rather than foster optimism from repentant promises to myself to go on a diet tomorrow, or start doing something differently, I draw inspiration from the awareness I’ve gained in recent years, and the certainty that I can accomplish anything I truly aspire to, as long as I just don’t get in my own way! Today my unconscious self was telling me something, so I will reflect on that, rather than the behavior it manifested, and see where that leads me.

Off to bed…

RawFu Challenge - Day 85

Tuesday, 03 November 2009

Once again, balance seems to be more of the challenge than just consuming only raw foods. My biggest obstacle continues to be just juggling everything and accommodating everyone’s different dietary needs. This week we have houseguests. Darren’s parents are down from Canada visiting. Having guests always causes me a little anxiety, as I want people to enjoy themselves while staying with me, but trying to find raw, or actually just vegan, options that everyone will like is often time consuming and expensive. So, I’m learning to let go a bit of worrying about it. I always inform people of our food situation, say they are welcome to try anything I prepare, and let go of any expectation of their experience of it. That approach seems to be working for me.

On Sunday, we hosted a potluck for our vegetarian MeetUp group here at our house. I scheduled it during my in-laws visit, thinking it would fill one meal slot that I didn’t have to worry about. We had a great turnout and lots of food choices. I made raw coleslaw, raw apple cobbler, a pumpkin spice smoothie and baked a gluten-free vegan carrot cake. Darren and I had no problem just having big salads with lots of veggies, the raw slaw and apple cobbler. Even though I’m not eating the other vegan options, I love seeing what people come up with and enjoy hosting the events.

However, having company always throws off my groove a bit. I’m feeling a little digestively sluggish today, and very happy that there’s nothing on the calendar for tomorrow. We’re just going to hang out and maybe take a drive somewhere in the afternoon.

Yesterday, Darren and I had a little raw food victory moment. My mom and her manfriend, Tom, came over to take Darren’s parents out to dinner. They all wanted to go to the Golden Coral, which is a cafeteria style buffet place in town. My mom eats at a buffet almost daily… senior discount… and though it’s just not at all appealing to me, I often feel a sadness that we really don’t share that experience of eating out anymore. It used to be a rather significant part of our bond, I think. But, that’s another reflective moment.

Anyway, with Darren’s parents here, I felt determined for us all to go out together, even if I just ate lettuce, and Joe (allergies) could only have a dry baked potato. Surprisingly, we did okay. I always carry a little bag of sea salt and spices in my purse, so we just made big salads, using a bit of olive oil, and the juice from lemon wedges. They also had melon and grapes, so we ate that. Joe had his dry baked potato, but we actually put olive oil and sea salt and pepper on that and he did fine, eating some melon, too. Flo ate pickles, a little salad, a baked potato with ketchup and canned peaches. So, all in all, could have been worse! I can’t believe the stuff they have at that place, though. Most of it doesn’t even register as anything I’d want to consume anymore, but I imagine it’s not the place to go if you have any control issues with food!

Today, Flo wanted to make spaghetti for her grandparents, so we made gluten-free noodles with marinara and I made a huge salad. Pretty simple. This afternoon, a batch of raw bread I made from sprouted buckwheat groats and hemp, flax, chia and pumpkin seeds was finished dehydrating, and I used up a couple of the butternut squash I had from our produce co-op to make a really yummy raw butternut squash soup in the VitaMix. It was a nice mid-day combo.

Lately, we’ve been asked a lot if we’ll continue to stay 100 percent raw when the challenge ends. My thoughts on that for now are probably not, though I will most likely just keep doing what I’ve been doing for the most part. This is for several reasons:

1. I am responsible for meal preparation for a family, and getting my kids to be 100 percent raw is not a realistic expectation, especially with Joe’s severe allergies. And because Darren and I often eat different things than the kids do, it creates a separateness that is somewhat exhausting. I think I do a pretty good job of finding a mid-way point of incorporating a lot of raw stuff into their diet, while providing lots of healthy whole food vegan options. But, being vegan is also important to me, and I want to be able to teach Flo some basic cooking skills (as well as, raw prep skills), but having a theoretical objection to cooking food would create an awkward dynamic and send mixed messages to her about healthy eating. I don’t want her to see raw foods as a restrictive stressful lifestyle choice, but rather a creative extension of being vegan and health-centered option for her to explore if she wants.
   
2. I have a history of an eating disorder, and anything that is too absolute or restrictive tends to trigger old negative thought patterns and fears. If anything else, my raw food experience has revealed to me the need to focus on behavior patterns and thought processes regarding eating (and everything), rather than just on specific food consumption. I think a strict raw food lifestyle is a definite pathway to improved health and mental clarity. But, I also think striving for raw food perfection can be a detriment to health if it causes social anxiety and stress. Again… it’s all about balance.
   
3. I don’t have a very big support circle of raw food buddies, and I already feel like I’m swimming upstream half the time in many social circles with our lifestyle choices. Many people are interested and curious about veganism and raw foods, but I’m acutely aware that I’m often perceived as a little “out there,” too. Of course, I will continue to try to connect with others with similar interests and enjoy that camaraderie when it avails itself.
   

So, on day 101, I won’t be abandoning my raw food journey. In fact, I will continue to further explore the raw food lifestyle and find the best balance for me right now. If nothing else, my pursuit of better health (both physical and mental) over the past five years has impressed upon me the importance of gradual transitions and openness to change. I think I will spend the last two weeks of our challenge brainstorming some new goals for myself and just being thankful for the freedom of choice I have and options available to me.